Have you seen all of those cute posters that say, "Be the kind of woman who, when your feet hit the floor in the morning, the devil says, 'Oh, no! She's up!'" I was going to be that woman today. I have felt so beaten down lately, and I finally recognized Satan's hands all over it last night. There is a lot going on in this household right now that is completely overwhelming and burdensome to me. Top of the list: my health. A recent neck CT showed that I have further degeneration and new arthritis developing at the site of the fusion I had done three and a half years ago. All of this mess is bulging in my neck and pushing on my spinal cord. I had the CT done because I have been in a lot of pain again recently, and I am starting to lose function in my right arm. Y'all.... I don't feel good!!! (*understatement of the year*) I'm on several new medications to counteract the pain and inflammation, and I'm not sure yet if they are helping or making it worse...
So here's the problem--Satan knew that I was going to get up with that mindset this morning, so he has been wearing me down all stinking day long. The day started with my alarm not going off, which made me late for an appointment, and it just kept going downhill from there. I have been counteracting with prayer, positive thinking, and praise/worship songs all day. So my question now is this: WHY do I feel like I'm still losing??
This is not a post where I want to whine a lot or have a "woe is me" moment. I just want to ask for prayers. I need to not feel like death every blessed day. I need to reach a point where I can function like a normal human being and not be completely overwhelmed with life. I need the peace of God to guard my heart and protect me from the lies that Satan throws at me every day. We need to reach a point where our finances are not a constant burden and concern. I want to dig deep and find the strength to make the devil think, "Oh, no! She's up!!!" My joy and hope are in Christ and his promise of eternity with him in heaven. This helps a little, too: